Can We Be Real?

A couple of years ago I told a friend of mine how I was becoming skeptical of what I refer to as the “Positivity Movement”.  I had embarked on a personal development journey (that was the foundation of this very blog); that challenged me to dig deep within myself, cleanse my soul, and seek God in order to find my purpose.  As a result, I found myself heavily entrenched in the world of Affirmations and Manifestations.  

Now I don’t have a problem at all with either.  Both are absolutely necessary on any transformational journey.  In fact, I still rely heavily on Affirmations, and still intend to manifest my best life through Christ Jesus and the power of positive/right thinking!

But after watching video after video, tuning in for masterclasses, and engaging with others on social media who were on the same journey, I began to feel isolated.  I was seeking God and asking Him to cleanse my soul and purify my heart.  Through that process I found myself feeling a range of unpleasant emotions, from sad to angry to frustrated and, at times, helpless.  If that weren’t enough, I was feeling guilty, ashamed, and inadequate for even feeling those emotions.  When I reflected on the things happening in society, I found myself often feeling outraged at the acts of racism I was witnessing.  

Unfortunately, I didn’t feel like I could reach out to the community I was entrenching myself in, because I felt like I would be perceived as being negative.  I recall one day I posted on Instagram asking the men, “Do you feel the pressure to be more feminine?”  One of the girls I greatly admired commented, “You draw to you what you focus on.”  It made me think.  Is racism and discrimination my fault?  Is it my fault Sandra Bland died in that prison, or Freddy Gray broke his neck in the back of that van?  I thought about how Nat Turner rose up to lead a slave rebellion; how Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat; how MLK, X, Medgars Evers, and many others, gave their life for the struggle.  And I thought how unfortunate it would be (for me, and you reading this)  if they would  have thought that recognizing discrimination and injustice, and calling it out, was attracting more discrimination and injustice into their life.  If they chose to look past it and only “focus” on the “positive”.  I thought how much of a blessing it is to even be able to “think positive”, to “manifest” “money/success/the good life”.  I mean if we can be real about it, people gave their life for this new generation to “chase the bag”.  

It was that moment that my skepticism materialized.  Maybe because my journey was legit founded on seeking God and His Word, and finding my purpose (I take my faith very seriously), I knew that I didn’t want to be that kind of “positive thinker”.  I wanted to be a positive thinker who could see the “bad”, discuss it and come up with positive solutions to make it better.  That’s what motivated me to make that comment to my friend that day.

Fast forward a few years and I find myself back at that same intersection.  This time not so much around the “Positivity Movement”, per se, but it’s cousin, the “Don’t Ruffle Feathers, Keep The Peace, Go Along to Get Along” Brigade.  I feel like we’ve gotten to a place in society where we are thin-skinned and reluctant to engage in critical thinking.  Because doing so (vocally) can be taken as offensive.  You can’t call out the truth, speak truth to power, admit fault or wrong, point out fault or wrong, or God forbid hurt someone’s feelings or ruffle someone’s feathers.  It’s like you have to go along with the mainstream to get along.  As someone who values critical thinking and believes in God’s Word and Holy Spirit, I find this very dangerous.  The way of the masses/the world is not always the right way.  In fact, nine times out of 10 it’s usually the wrong way.  If you’re a believer like I am, you know Jesus was all about love, but He turned up when the time called for it.  You also know that Matthew 10:34 says “Do not think that I came to bring peace on earth.  I did not come to bring peace but a sword.”  

I wanted to express these thoughts in the hopes that it reminds you to toughen up, stay vigilant in these times, and remind you that you are not alone if you’ve been witnessing and/or feeling this too.  I’ve started witnessing this more and more with Politics and the Presidential election.  If you question or call out the record or qualifications of someone’s favored candidate, you get accused of attacking them.  Or even worse, being complicit in “Cancel Culture.”  This is particularly disturbing, because I don’t subscribe to “Cancel Culture” at all.  I believe in hearing both sides, analyzing and evaluating the data and/or facts, and forming an opinion that takes into account the truth represented by both sides.  But it seems if that truth is counterproductive to what the mainstream is pushing, then good luck being heard without being accused and dismissed.  

The most recent example I’ve encountered with this is making a comment on an episode of The View.  The thread was about replacing Megan McCain.  Now I don’t want to “cancel” Megan, but in all honesty, I don’t think she is a good fit with the other ladies.  She tends to quickly get defensive about her points (points that I tend to agree with oftentimes) and it results in bickering back and forth.  As a viewer, I find it frustrating.  The discussion gets derailed, and we don’t end up learning anything, because the discussions hardly advance past the statements made.  So I commented and said I would like to see Megan replaced with a hardcore conservative (meaning someone who firmly stands behind their conservative ideas and convictions) who brought intellectualism, humility and grace to the discussion.  In my mind I was thinking Condeleeza Rice.  And someone commented accusing me of being a hardcore conservative and a bunch of other things that I didn’t commit to memory.  This saddens me, and highlights my point, because I’m not a Republican or a Democrat.  I’m an Independent.  I tend to vote Democrat more times than not, but my allegiance is not to them.  I’m always open to consider a Republican candidate.  But the point is, this person assumed that because I was advocating for a conservative voice on the show that I was a Trump supporter, and thus part of the problem.  They didn’t take my comment at face value and consider why I would say what I said, or if what I said had any value.  They didn’t offer a stronger point of why the show should only have liberal views.  They just assumed I was a Trump supporter and accused me of being a part of the problem.  (For the record, I am NOT a Trump supporter.  Till this day I cannot believe people voted this man in office and continue to assuage his incompetence and depravity)

How are we to grow individually as a people, and collectively as a society if this is how we govern ourselves?  Where are we headed if we cease to critically think?  How strong are we, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually; if we turn from the truth and only entertain, engage, and support what feels good and is easy?  I hope we change course as a society.  At this rate, we are eroding our democracy if voices of truth and reason continue to be etched out.  We think Trump is moving us toward facism, but truth be told, it’s suppressing voices of dissension that does it faster than any one man could.

But yeah, Beautiful.  These are just my thoughts.  If you have been witnessing or experiencing this, know you are not alone.  Your voice and opinion matter.  No matter how aggressively or politely you express it.  If you have taken the time to critically think about anything, and have formed an opinion around it based in truth, it matters.  And it will always be welcome here.  Whether I agree with it or not!

Until next time, Beautiful, Keep Speaking Truth!  And speaking with the fullness of expression that God gave you.  Because, remember, even Jesus was controversial! 😉

Xoxo,

LM